Be Body Wise

Last night the whole centre ventured the 30 minutes into London to hear Shantree speak about forest gardening.  Coming back was a very different feeling for me.  We arrived home about 10 O’clock that evening.  It felt weird being on the highway with the business of the world wizzing by.  Everything is so simple and scerene on the “ranch” that it is easy to forget that a world of chaos exists all around us.  I was surprised at the feelings that emerged as we pulled into the drive – comfort and happiness resonated in my heart.  It felt like coming “home”.  I was able to be at peace with my meantime home in this moment in time.  A drastic change to my thoughts of running away only a week prior!  I was actually excited to snuggle up in my sleeping bag out in my big red tent!

Earlier that day, Shantree had decided to ride with us on our way into London.  I wasted no opportunities to pick his brain, and indulge my curiosity.  The talk that we had about our constitutions was fresh in my mind, and I was eager to put an action plan in motion.  I felt a new sense of energy since it became clear to me where I need to go in order to bring my body back into balance.  The trick is how do I get there?  There are many “travel agents” that can help us plan our routes down this path of life.  Shantree understands the higways systems very well, so I am always glad for his advice.  The most fascinating thing I learnt from our conversation, however, was not which herbs, foods, or lifestyle improvements that could act as my highways to balance. 

The most fascinating thing I learnt while chatting together had nothing to do with the answers he gave me.  It was the realization that I already HAD all the answers to my questions the ENTIRE TIME!  My body has been pulling me towards the solutions to the questions I was asking.  This is very exciting to me to know that I am not a factury defect.  That I possess the ability to tend to my body’s ever changing needs.  Now, the somewhat frusterating thing is that I didn’t 100% trust where these little urges were coming from.  My body was telling me to eat every food that Shantree rattled off the top of his head, and impliment, supplement certain things into my lifestyle.  EXCITING – I know what I need.  FRUSTERATING – I not trusting that I know what I need.  Why is this?  Because I was getting in my own way, that’s why! I thought that my mind, and other people knew better then my body.  Which, I am finding out, is never the case.  The body never lies.

A lot of the foods that I was craving are more suited for Vattas, and ones Pittas should, for the most part, steer clear of.  (Helpful reminder: I am a dominent Pitta, with a Vatta imbalanace)  This lead me to think, “No body, that is not what we need.  That is Vatta food.  We are a Pitta, remember?”  OKAY, now here is the amazing part.  When you have an imbalance of one of the doshas in your body, you first need to balance out the imbalanced dosha, while also taking into consideration your constitution.  When this is achieved you then return to your Dosha specific diet.  Learning that was like turning on the light switch – BING!  “So, I really DID know what I need – Holy Poop, we all know what we need.  We just need to listen and TRUST!  Why is it that you don’t know that you know what you know until you know it, you know? And why does it seem like the hardest questions have the simplest answers?  Oh the joys of being human!

Here are some guidelines for being Human:  (Adapted from Rob Bishop)

1)   You will receive a body.  It will be yours for your entire life.  You may love it, or hate it.  The choice is yours.

2)   There are no mistakes, only lessons.  Growth is the process of trial, error and experimentation.  “Failed” experiments are as much a part of the process as “successful” ones.

3)   You will learn lessons.  Each one of us is enrolled in the informal, full-time, never ending School of Life.  Everyday you are given the opportunity to learn lessons.  You may like the lessons, or decide that they are irrelevant and stupid.  Again the choice is yours.

4)   A lesson is repeated until it is learnt.  A lesson will present itself in many forms until you have learnt it.  Once you have learned it, you can then go onto the next one.

5)   The process of learning lessons doesn’t stop.  Every part of life contains lessons.  As a general rule of thumb – if you are breathing, you are living, and if you are living then there are lessons to be learnt.

6)   Being “There” is no better to being “Here”.  When your “There” becomes your “Here”, you will simply obtain another “There” that will again, look better than “Here”

7)   Other People are simply mirrors of what you see in yourself.  You cannot Love, or Hate something about another person, unless it reflects something that you Love or Hate in yourself.

8)   What you make of your life is up to YOU.  You have all the tools and resources that you will ever need.  What you choose to do with them is up to you. 

9)   All the answers to all Life’s questions, your questions, are inside you.  All you need to do is look, listen and trust.

10)You will either choose to forget this, or you will choose to remember it.

11)IF you choose to remember, you will know that with forgiveness, love, laughter AND TRUST, you will embrace ALL that is yours, TAKE your place as a guide and LIVE a life in absolute abundance, love and ADVENTURE.

 

Peace, Love and Laughter y’all!

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Do what you Love, Love what you do.

Today I made peace with the Greenhouse.  I actually enjoyed my time with the plants.  The process of watering all of them is tedious and long, but can be very medicinal.  When Shantree first told me that I was going to be the Greenhouse Diva for the next few weeks I thought, “Great, a new challenge for me to tackle!  This is going to be fun.”  Although after about 5 minutes on my own I wasn’t feeling such inthusasium.  In fact I was angry.  I hated going into the greenhouse, well not hated (because in my family “we don’t hate”), but I definitely had very strong negative feelings towards this particular job.  My time in the greenhouse felt like being in a cage.  I felt totally trapped.  Really, it became a prison of my own creation. 

I came to the centre determined to learn EVERYTHING and be SUCCESSFUL.  Which is NOT a bad thing, but how I decided to project that was not very helpful to my growth.  Since I decided (subconsciously) to exist in a self imposed prison I thought, “What the heck.  I am here to learn, WHY am I stuck in here all by myself without a clue as to what I am suppose to be doing?  Nobody is teaching me anything.  Besides, this is not my work.  I have nothing to do with these plants.  They are the product of someone else’s work.  I should be out in the garden, or in the kitchen learning something.”  I was totally blind to the unspoken lessons you begin to pick up when you slow down, open your eyes and listen. 

Somehow along the path of life I got myself stuck on a track, a track of a speeding train going nowhere fast.  I became so wrapped up in myself, trying to do everything right and being perfect, as well as what my future held for me, that I stopped being totally present to what was actually going on around me.  I mean I wasn’t totally submerged, I was still able to come up for air – especially when dealing with other people.  When dealing with myself however, I wasn’t completely present. 

It is truly fascinating how are minds, or our egos, can so easily lie to us, telling us what they need us to hear.  This ego of ours is a double-edged sword, that is an integral part of our built in survival mechanisms.  The ego is there to serve our best interests, because our ego wants us to survive.  When it is necessary our ego will step in to do damage control until we are ready to deal with the emotions, or situations that cause us dis-ease.  The trouble starts when we forget to go back and do the work.  Meltdowns occur when things keep piling up and we are already so far behind.

What I am starting to learn is how essential it really is to listen to the advice our bodies are trying to communicate to us.  Not only is it hard to hear our bodies due to all the mental clutter, but also most of us have stopped looking inside ourselves for the answers.  Instead we look externally for the solutions to our happiness. 

I have never had a hard time hearing what my body has been telling me.  What I have been struggling with is the act of Listening and following what I am being told.  As I slowly start to sink into the simplicity of being here at the centre, and consciously start to take back the reigns to my own life I am flabbergasted by how much I actually did know that I needed.   Which is EXCITING, but kind of make me want to bang my head against a wall for not taking the necessary steps towards giving it to myself.   BUT, it also makes me rejoice because now that I am understanding the reasons behind these impulses I can accommodate myself even better!

I am still not too overly fussy about being in the greenhouse, but I have chosen to change my attitude and enjoy myself.  The work needs to get done, so I may as well have fun while I am doing it!

Food for thought:  It is true that you should do what you love, but it is also true that you also should love what you do – even if it is not what you love. 

Peace, Love and Laughter y’all!

Wednesday, May 27

The Day Before the First

SO, today is the day!  I can’t believe it but it is finally here.  Today is day one of a 3-month intensive in self-healing and self-empowerment.  I am here to do the work and gain the tools and knowledge in order to pass on the lessons to as many people as I can.  I am excited, but determined to venture there with an empty cup.  I have no idea where this journey will take me, but I am here and I am present.  I am ready to take the steps and go with the flow.  We are always growing, changing, evolving, but I know I will still be me when I come out the other side.  Stayed tuned because there is going to be some pretty amazing stuff to pass on, or at least some great stories.

This morning when Anna asked me how I was feeling and I answered after a deep breath– Ready.  And the truth is I am ready to walk the path of the peaceful warrior.  I was feeling a few pangs of anxiousness over the last few days of our 30-hour trip thinking, “WHAT have I gotten myself into?  Am I really for this?  Is this really what I want?”  But now that I am here I feel like it is something that I need to experience. 

It is almost time for Anna’s journey to come to a close.  We are leaving for the airport in 10 or so minutes where I will drop her off and then venture out to the centre.  I can’t believe that we made it all the way without killing each other, but we did!  It was one heck of a long drive!  It is amazing to me actually how big and diverse our country is.  The scenery we pass was as different as our conversations!    It was amazing to experience, one that I am glad I got a chance to share with m cousin even though it was so incredibly long. 

I will be glad to have my parents with me on the drive home, because I am going to make them drive while I sit co-pilot and take in the scenery!  I ended up driving the whole way!  I found that the first day was easy for me, especially now that I have done so many long hour car trips.  The second day was more of a challenge, however.   After the second straight day of 12 driving for 12 hours I was exhausted!  I could barely keep my eyes open when we got to the hotel.  Day three was not so bad.  Probably because I knew that we only had 6 hours left!  The drive through Michagin is very nice.  Lots of trees and greenery to make you feel grateful – the 110 speed limit and double lane highway was not to shabby as well!

We managed to make it to London virtually unscathed.  I only got pulled over once by the cops for doing 113km – he gave me a warning, but since I didn’t have my driver’s license (lost it somewhere) I got a ticket for that (shoot!).  Anna got us stopped at the border for bringing tobacco and Alcohol into the country.  Appearntly that’s a no go when your only out of the country for 3 hours!  Guess we should have looked into that!  Everything turned out fine.  Anna just had to pay the tax.  Could have been a lot worse.

 The highlights of the trip would have to be: stopping in Konora (so beautiful), driving through Northern Ontario (esp Lake of the Woods), building an innukshuk on the side of the Trans Canada, seeing the Terry Fox memorial sight, as well as, the birth place of Winnie-the-pooh AND FINALLY getting to the hotel in London.  II almost cried I was so happy!  Last night, our final night together, we kicked back at a local mexicano cantena for guacamole (I still make better, but I am not biased what so ever!) and lime margarettas!  We wrapped up the evening with a walk and a relaxing evening spent in the hotel room watching a movie.  All-in-all a great trip!

More to come,

Peace, Love and Laughter Y’all

The first day

I arrived at the centre in the late morning.  Everyone was there to greet me and help me get settled into my new living space, which happens to be a big red tent!  It definitely is cozy and roughing it.  Good thing I am open minded!  I will be grateful to have a place of my own that I can retreat to – even if it is a tent.  My little community is behind the vegitable garden, and beside the pear trees.  We share an outdoor shower, an open wash area and port-a-poties (could be interesting).  There is a spring fed pond to swim in, as well as, many beautiful sitting areas and trees to sit under.  There is an indoor common space where we can “plug in”, watch movies, and hangout called the Hive! 

My first impression of the centre feels like being at a non-scary, laid back, country ashram!  The people here seem to be very nice.  I look forward to getting to know them better!  I have met one of my teachers, Shantre.  He seems totally different then I first thought.  Way less intimidating and very welcoming. 

Time will only tell!

Peace, Love and Laughter y’all

I arrived at the centre in the late morning.  Everyone was there to greet me and help me get settled into my new living space, which happens to be a big red tent!  It definitely is cozy and roughing it.  Good thing I am open minded!  I will be grateful to have a place of my own that I can retreat to – even if it is a tent.  My little community is behind the vegitable garden, and beside the pear trees.  We share an outdoor shower, an open wash area and port-a-poties (could be interesting).  There is a spring fed pond to swim in, as well as, many beautiful sitting areas and trees to sit under.  There is an indoor common space where we can “plug in”, watch movies, and hangout called the Hive! 

My first impression of the centre feels like being at a non-scary, laid back, country ashram!  The people here seem to be very nice.  I look forward to getting to know them better!  I have met one of my teachers, Shantre.  He seems totally different then I first thought.  Way less intimidating and very welcoming. 

Time will only tell!

Peace, Love and Laughter y’all

The first night

At the end of day one I feel that this whole roughing it is really not that bad, at least that is what I am telling myself.  I was feeling a little disappointed, I don’t think that is the right word, maybe it was overwhelmed, or maybe just not what I expected.  Even though everyone was so welcoming and the grounds are so pretty I defiantly haven’t been feeling that sense of peace I had this morning.  It wasn’t until I sat down and started to write about it that my attitude began to change.  I am so lucky to even have this opportunity.  I’ll get into a new routine soon enough and then I will wonder why I was ever feeling weird about it in the first place! 

It takes time to settle into a new rhythm.  There isn’t much comfort in the unknown.  However I am going to keep an open mind and stay positive.    

Peace, Love and Laughter y’all!

The Other Day

OKAY, so my first night was not that great.  I am not sure why, but I felt more alone then I have in a very long time.  Everyone was so welcoming, but they also have their own rhythms.  I know I will fit in soon enough, but last night I couldn’t help but look up to the heavens and wonder,

“WHAT AM I DOING HERE?  I am covered in misqueto bites, living in a tent, cold, and all alone.  I must be INSANE!  I don’t think that I am going to make it.  I want to go home so bad.  I don’t think this is for me.   Again a whole new set of people, a whole new way of life.  This is TOO MUCH.  What was I thinking?“

I was so upset that I cried myself to sleep like a sad, scared little child.  (I know!  I am working hard on that whole honoring yet being in charge of your emotions.  It is a process, Right?)

 In the middle of the night I had to go to the bathroom so bad, yet could bring myself to make the hike to the outhouse that I ended up peeing in one of my water bottles!  I washed it thoroughly this morning!  (Who knew all my years of  getting drug tested and peeing into a cup would paid off someday! EEEWWW!)

Despite my not-so-smooth first night at the centre I did wake up this morning with a positive outlook.  Even though it was only 5:40 and I already had 3 misquito bites, as I trekked down to the wash station to get ready for the day (and clean my water bottle with massive amounts of soap) I felt recharged.  The air was so crisp and fresh, the birds were singing their sweet morning melodies, and I had made it through the night.

This is a huge change I am making and I have to give myself credit for jumping in.  I am not entirely sure how far down this rabbit hole I want to enter.  I still want to function in my world, while adding as much from this world that is functional.  It is the balancing act that I am destined and determined to figure out.   One of my favorite things we do each day is take a break mid-morning.  It is called tree time.  Everyone grabs an apple and spends ½ and hour by a tree, or in my case IN the tree.  It is so fun to reconnect with a childhood passion of climbing trees.  Somehow I always feel more at peace in the air then on the ground!

Another great thing is that we all eat together.  That has always been a big thing in my family and I find comfort in it.  So far, I am thoroughly enjoying the food!  Everything is amazing!  I can’t wait to get into the kitchen and learn EVERYTHING.  Lasagna was served at lunchtime.  Which was also very comforting, since it is one of my mother’s specialties.  Today I worked in the garden with Ron and Jason, the forest gardening apprentices.  It was fun, but it definitely isn’t a calling.  I am going to ask Shantree and Lorena tomorrow if I can move into the kitchen. 

As for my transition here I keep reminding myself that each day will get easier.   It seems crazy that I have pick up and gone away again.  I was really starting to enjoy being in Saskatoon with my friends and family.  I just need to give myself time to adjust

Peace, Love and Laughter y’all